I learned several things on this trip:
1. In Switzerland, a 2 km taxi ride costs 17 euros.
2. Global warming is terrible for chocolate sales--people stop buying solid chocolatey confections right around 25° C. Last Easter was the hottest on record for at least a century in Britain. Poor Cadbury...so many eggs were put in one hot ass basket (and had to be thrown out).
3. Swiss Franc notes looks like Lichtenstein-y pop art....kind of.
The next day, I spent some time in Zurich. I was driven there in an Audi A8 by the friendliest driver in the world. His name was Frank, he spoke 5 languages, has 2 kids and is going to run the Berlin marathon this fall. He has driven Eminem, David Beckham, and Lady Gaga. He said Becks was the nicest celebrity he's ever driven. He asked me not to tell anyone that. But I'm bad at keeping secrets.
Here's what I can say about Zurich.
1. It's really, REALLY f***ing expensive (a salad near the lake -- without any sort of protein, mind you -- was 22.50). For lunch, I bought a banana, chicken salad, a Red Bull and Lindt chocolate bon bons in a COOP grocery store. It was only about 16 euros.
2. Everyone drives nice cars. I was almost run over by an orange Ferrarri Testarossa.
3. The lake is full of swans. And kids swimming/rough-housing. So I guess Swiss kids are usually covered in swan doodoo residue.
4. Swiss women wear much nicer footwear than Dutch or German women. Both fragile and ferocious in appearance, they look like they could be blown over by a slight breeze...but also like they could cut you with their sharp extremities..
5. It's really, really beautiful there. I wish it wasn't made so rich by Nazi gold. Neutral, my ass...
Pretty sure those sunbathers are topless.
That pear cost one million euros.
David defeated Goliath, I know that. But I didn't know he was a Na'vi.
Champagne-filled bon bons. Heavenly.
This dog is richer than you.
I'm out. Gotta Google "Swiss Chocoholics Anonymous" meetings...
xx Jess
